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Dear John Dave Geoff Other

This is the easiest most fun hardest letter I have ever had to write.

I’ve spent most of the morning drinking rum dancing naked in the rain crying. I realise that there was nothing I could say that you wanted to hear. I hope I didn’t make a nuisance of myself. I’m a total arse-biscuit fuck-donkey twat-face noob like that.

In a way, it is better that I express myself through mime sky writing blogging. I can’t say everything I want to say here, but, I hope you know anyway. Otherwise, it’s all been for nothing.

Choose one or more of the following clichés:

• it’s not you, it’s me
• it’s for the best
• time’s a great healer
• it will get better

Or write your own:

   I never saw this coming. I thought we were solid. How farking shiteballs.     

In the meantime I will put on an air of nonchalance a tartan cape a brave face. This may seem stupid uncaring cold-hearted or all three but I don’t know what else to do. Life has been so stupidly totally really hard lately that I sometimes feel quite hysterical. I guess this is all a coping mechanism. Hope you find one too.

Choose one or more of the following sentiments:

• I miss you √
• I will always adore you √
• you are one of the best people I have the privilege to know √

Or write your own:

   You said it won’t ever be the same. But in my heart I know one day it will be better than it ever has been.   

WARNING: PUBLISHING THIS LETTER IS ILL-ADVISED, ESPECIALLY IF THE USER IS UNDER EXTREME EMOTIONAL DISTRESS AND HAS NOT REALLY SLEPT VERY WELL. THE USER MUST ACCEPT ALL RESPONSIBILITY FOR ANY ADVERSE REACTIONS. IF YOU ARE THE USER AND ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY, CROSS HERE : X

Choose one or more sign off:

• yours sincerely
• yours faithfully
• regards
• that’s all folks

Or write your own:

                                                                                                                                                

Print your name here:

a broken-hearted MoVo