Blood is thicker than water, they say, which is kind of true, cos if you try to dilute some Vimto with blood it doesn’t really work. It’s way too thick. Your Vimto goes all gloopy, and tastes weird, and suddenly you’re not allowed to help out at playgroup any more.
BUT ANYWAY, I guess what they mean is, y’know, family ties are more important than, erm, watery ones. Which is fair enough. It’s an old saying, a proper vintage adage that has, like, historical weight to it, so yeah, it’s got to be true for a heck of a lot of people. Maybe not those people who are related to serial killers, or Piers Morgan, but most people, I’d have thought. Including me! I love my family. BLOOD. I love my blood. And here I mean anyone related to me by blood, not my actual blood. Although I am fond of my actual blood. It does its stuff quite handily, and is a nice red colour. YAY PLASMA!
This is the MODERN AGE, tho, innit. Like, now. It’s not yesterday, or days of yore. They happened already. This is the present day. If we’re talking about family (which I am, yo) then that can’t be neatly explained and put into little sections and labelled with washi tape and written on in fancy handwriting. It just don’t work like that any more. Family means much stuff to lotsa folk, and recently I’ve been considering my own family unit and realising it for the special and treasured thing it is.
Obvs there’s my blood kin, I’ve mentioned them. Bloooooood. YAY PLATELETS! This is my best GCSE Biology-based knowledge shining through here, by the way. OH YES – I got a B. I am practically a bona fide scientist, yes I am shut up. ANYWAY. Family. So, so much more than literal relations. I feel lucky enough to have close friends that I definitely could not use to dilute my Vimto, purely because they’d make it too gloopy and weird. BUT THAT’S A GOOD THING, STAY WITH ME. I have an ex-husband who is an excellent father and will be a good friend for life. I have online acquaintances who – even tho I’ve never met some of them – give me an intense hit of camaraderie whenever I fire up my WiFi. Big smooches to them. And, hey – I have a boyf, and a Moo, and that on its own is otherworldly awesome; but the WHOLE LOT make it a pure damn beautiful modern family unit right there, folks.
Before I go all gooey and tear up and snot all over my laptop, y’all should know this is probably ze hormonez talking. I’m on a contraceptive pill called That’s A Fuck Load Of Oestrogen, Bitch and it’s playing havoc with my levels. HOWEVER, I do think it’s a thing to mull. What constitutes a ‘family’ for you? Is there such a thing as a ‘traditional’ family unit any more? Does it even matter? (I bet the Daily Mail thinks it does) (the fuckers) (as long as we’re ALL HAPPY, right?)
*GCSE Biology. Got a B.