*sings* Shiny, shiny new book for you! Who wants a new book? Is it you? Oh please do! *stops singing*
OK so I’m no Gary farking Barlow, it took me TEN MINUTES to compose that jolly ditty and I’m farking PROUD, yeah? Joy does strange things to your mind and, absolutely totally for a moment there I thought I was capable of producing song. Well, turns out I am shit at that, but what I am good at it is blogging and stuff, and to prove it, I’ve published a little ebook which you might purchase for your good selves, called…
That’s it, that’s my blog post book, all the good stuff from motherventing compiled and compacted into uber-shminky digital form, without any guff or nonsense to distract you from the quality spaff.
And all for the princely sum of £1.02!
That is LITERALLY the best £1.02 you will EVER spend. I guarantee you. And if it’s not, just let me know, and I’ll refund* you. (*I won’t. I’ll hex you instead)
S’all I have to say for now. If you have ever read any of my blog posts and thought they were all right/awesome/like the bible only better, then please do reach into your capacious bank accounts and download my book to carry with you forever. It might give me the impetus to write mooooooore.
If you don’t have an Kindle or other electronic reading device, you can download a reading app for your computer or whatever, and that is free. And THEN you can buy my book. Aha.
Instructions, for the bewildered and overwhelmed:
- buy book
- read book
- laugh, cry, vomit, whatevs
- leave a five star review
- read book again
- send me biscuits
That’s pretty much it. Easy, mais non?
£1.02. You know it makes sense.
I loves y’all. Thank you.
*exits, mounted on a unicorn*