Lick
OK, OK it had to be done. Y’all know how I’ve licked Kevin Spacey? Well, there’s plenty of other people I’d happily take my tongue to. Oh yes. And not your regular muscled hunks either, no no. This Lick List is dedicated to the oddities we somehow INEXPLICABLY fancy, and the whole world thinks we’re mentalistic, but we don’t care, cos given half the chance, and no restraining orders (sorry Kev) we would TOTALLY and SLEAZILY lick them. ON THE FACE.
This be my Lick List. Who’s on yours? (remember: must be a bit odd. Regular smuttage-fodder not allowed)
- Tom Jones
- Brian Blessed
- Alan Rickman (that VOICE *spaff*)
- Gary Oldman
- Morgan Freeman
- Cliff Richard
- Alan Cumming
- Richard E. Grant
- Rowan Atkinson
- Kevin Costner (what is it about Kevins?)
- the weather man on my local news (I don’t know his name, Geoff summat, or Dave)
- David Mitchell (the comedian)
- David Mitchell (the author)
- Tim Dowling
- Jon Ronson
- Russell Brand (I know, I know, but I just would, OK? Just to see what he tasted like)
- the Pope
- Barack Obama
- Prof Brian Cox
- Steve Buscemi
- Danny de Vito
Oh gawd, I could go on. Please bear in mind when compiling such a list, it is a LICK list, not a shag list, or a roger gently list, or a spanking list. That’s an ENTIRELY different matter and MANY more blog posts.
So. C’mon. Who are you going to lick?
I’ve just noticed mine seem to be mostly be old men. Old, bearded men. Yikes.
…and Patrick Stewart…
Yes, v popular. Get in line.
I freaked out the comic shop guy in Dublin by screaming “PATRICK STEWART!!!” when I can across a 10 Euro figure of Jean Luc Piccard :p
If you licked Russell Brand you could probably get high from the leftover heroin still fermenting through his body.
And I TOO, would TOTALLY lick Prof Cox.
I’m not sure that’s how heroin works?
Maybe not usually but the amount he has consumed over the years it’s probably being regenerated in his cells…
Top of my lick list has gotta be Ryan Golsing and John and Edward Grimes ( i know i know)
OK Ryan Gosling is a hunk so technically not allowed. And JEDWARD: NO. NOOOOOOOOO. You wrong’un.
I’m agreeing on Russell Brand and Alan Rickman…. I’d also add Hugh Laurie, Hugh Grant, Howard Donald… erm…. Simon Cowell, Tim Minchin, and erm…. Laurence Llwelyn Bowen (it’s the hair!!) Did I just admit to that out loud?
LMAO oooohhhhhhhh Tim Minchin is a shmink. I would do MORE than lick him, which is why he’s not on my Lick List
bit late to the game here but i would lick the following:
pete townsend
ray winstone
trevor eve
thank you
Pete: no, Ray: yeah, Trevor: NOOOOOOO not another Trevor lover
Better than nigel Kevin no?
I would like to add Damon Albarn
You may.
ANYTHING better than Nigel
Alexander Armstrong, Boris Becker and definitely with you on Russell Brand and Alan Rickman.
BORIS BECKER!! *falls over*
I heart him! Liebe ihn von ganzem herzen rrrrrrrrrr
*shakes head sadly*
Nigel Havers.
No. Really? No. What! REALLY?
I know I know. I can’t help it.
You and me are going to have words, madam.
Cliff? I think I’ve just vommed. Colostomy Cliff should not be licked by anyone…..bleugh!
He might taste nice.
Oh yeah, especially the bit round his colostomy. Yummy! Hahahaha!
You sick little puppy
Martin Clunes, Tim Roth, Sean Connery. And may I say that Patrick Stewart’s on every list of mine (cos surely licking would lead somewhere …yeah, I know, restraining order).
OOOHHHHHH Sean Connery. YES. Tim Roth? Maybe. But Martin Clunes?? NOOOO. Just cos he does those adverts. So NOOOOOO.
This is fun. Ok in no particular order:
Bill Nighly
Richard Branson
Jens Albinus (Hallgrim from ‘The Eagle: A crime odyssey.’ Danish tv series – very popular in Oz)
Alan Rickman
Daniel Day Lewis
Bob Geldof
Jarvis Cocker
Richard Branson? I bet he tastes RICH. Like expensive biscuits.
how on earth did you manage to lick kevin spacey? did it result in a restraining order? lol
Erm, I’ll tell the story another time. And, uh, maybe…
Sir Trevor McD of course – he’s gotta taste good, surely!
NO. I have an natural distrust of anyone called Trevor!
Ooh, yes to Alan Cumming. Also, Michael Palin.
Oh, Michael Palin! Good one. I would also lick John Cleese.
I reckon Russell Brand would taste salty, and his cheek would be a bit greasy.
Hmm my lick list would include Denzel Washington, Johhny Galecki, and Prof Brian Cox’ wife, Gia Milinovich.. just because.
God, I am weird.
Who ist da Johnny Galecki? And JA to Denzel.
He’s Leonard from The Big Bang Theory.
I thought of another one… Stephen Mangan. OH GOD YES!
Oh YES!! Leonard, YES. And also Sheldon? Heck, I’d lick all of them!! And Stephen. Mmmmhhmmmmm.
What’shisname who nicked off with Keeley Hawes … also my hairdresser Miguel. I know.
You have a hairdresser called Miguel? Class.
*preens and flicks hair*
Lulu, Dervla Kirwan and Mrs Windass from Coronation Street.
LMAO thank you! Lulu, PMSL. Dervla’s a bit of a fox, nothing odd about her… no idea who Mrs W is. I shall have to google
Definitely Hugh Laurie and *whispers* Gene Hunt from Life on Mars.
HL is allowed. Gene Hunt? Oh go on then. He’ll taste all manly. I’m sure.
Bruce Parry, the guy that presented Tropic of Capricorn, Charlie Boorman – actually he’d get it so moves to the ‘do’ list.
Yes, it is definitely JUST a lick here. My ‘to do’ list is totally different
Mark Gardner of indie band Ride – shows my age – would be on do list but he always pushed scuzzy too far, I’d worry what I’d find in his hair. So yes for him, a lick. But a long one.
Ride? I vaguely remember them…
I’m definitely with you on Alan Rickman! Ever since the Texas In Demand video. Licking only obviously! What about Tom Selleck? Martin Freeman? Simon Pegg?
Selleck, no, too hunky. Freeman, yes. Pegg, maybe. But only cos he was in Star Trek. I’d lick Nick Frost, though!
Our office boasts a very nice Cliff calender that you would adore. Particularly Cliff in chaps.
I would like Boris all over the face.
Boris no. BORIS NO. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
I would def lick Obama, Alan Rickman, Cliff Richard? No no no!
May I add Philip Schofield, Jack Black, Liam Neeson, Johnny Depp (yes he does also go on the ‘he’d get it list’ and John Cusack (love his voice). I’m sure there’s more, leave it with me.
Johnny Depp is too hunky, not weird enough. The others: fine. Esp John Cusack. Oh YUS.
Oh come on let me lick him, he is rather odd, yes? *nods enthuisiasticlly*
Well – yes – I guess. But traditionally, he’s hunky, yeah?
Oh yes he is hunky, can’t deny that. How about this, when he’s in his Mad Hatter or Willy Wonka attire he can be licked as, even though I still would, he is def more odd than hunky.
DEAL
Alan Rickman -lick, Cliff Richard- not if it were the zombie apocalyse and licking him conferred invincibility, Anyone for Jason Isaacs?
Ah but Jason Isaacs would come under hunkish, mais non?
James Corden. I love him. That is all.
Hmmm OK you can have him, purely cos he made such a sweet speech at the Tonys.
Am I the ONLY one who wants to lick Nigel Havers????? xxx
YES
Hurrumph!! ;o) x
No! I’d lick nigel! And bill oddy out of curiosity of to what he tastes like…hmmm…and david suchet and david attenborough….i may be back with more..
hope the hayfever clears up:o)
xxx
Patrick Stewart, lick. Alan Rickman, lick. Alam Cumming, strangely yes. But a tickly little lick with the tip of my tongue.
David Bowie – but ONLY when dressed as the Goblin King.
Dogtanian. Yes, that’s right. I said Dogtanian. The fictional cartoon canine muskateer.
Cliff Richards – NO! You sick mofreaker!
Yes, to all of those, nice additions. Maybe not the cartoon character?
And YES, Cliff is a LEGEND.
ooohhh i almost don’t want to admit this!!!……….All of them off Top Gear, but especially James May *cringe*.
*shriek* NOOOOOOOOO
Cliff Richard? Sweet Jesus, woman!
I switched to the laptop to try and nominate Patrick Stewart before anyone else did, damnit! I have a T-shirt of his big bald head which I bought when I was 16 and I even did a collage tribute to him the other month if you’ll forgive the link: http://mommy-beadzoid.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/i-heart-captain-picard.html
Other licks would include Alan Rickman, Billy Bob Thornton, Benedict Cumberbatch, Gianluca Vialli, Nick Cave, Bob Smith (The Cure), Matt Bellamy (Muse), and Roberto Baggio (former Italian footballer – topical!) and even Richard Gere, while we’re doin’ Buddhists – hell, throw in Steven Segal too for good measure!
That’s a good list. And a worrying collage of PS. Ahem.
Cliff Richard cos, well, y’know, he’s a legend, innit. And his calendars are funny. Oh I dunno. I think I’m hormonal.
Yeah I’d totally stalk him if I had a free slot in my diary. Hey ho!
There’s hormonal then there’s…. well, that! He might sing Living Doll at you too, how would you not vomit over his suede loafers?
*swoon*
Matt Bellamy huh? Why HULLOOO fellow freak
Isn’t he married to someone famous now?
Kevin McCloud (shame)
WOMAN. NO. Oh, all right then. I can’t judge.
Yes, yes Kevin McCloud.
OK but only if he gives you a nice, big house afterwards
Oh Alan Rickman for the voice deffo…. and Gary Oldman YES He would get a nice big lick. Hugh Laurie I think because I like posh. And Michael Moon from Eastenders lol x
Hugh Laurie, OK. Michael Moon….? Hmmm, maybe, if he stopped being EVIL to #poorjean
I think its the evil I like. Gotta love a bad bad boy x
But yes poor Jean I agree x
#poorjean
Cliff. Richards? Really?
Blimey.
Yes I would lick his face. I imagine him to be like mahogany. Cold and aromatic. And vaguely dead-seeming.
I have a prod list! People I want to prod (in an affectionate way, well mostly) but now you’ve mentioned licking…
Kylie, Madonna, Justin Timberlake, David Boreanaz, David Tennant, Ian Somerhalder, The Queen… Ah there are loads I could go on and on!
There are some HUNKS on there, and I’m not talking about Madonna. I will accept the Queen.
Kenneth Brannagh! Also agree with the Patrick Stewart comment though. Maybe it’s something to do with Shakespearean actors.
YES. Ken. I would lick Ken. Good one.
Patrick Stewart. I would lick him to death whilst me mesmerised me with that voice of his.
Oohhhhhhh GOOD ONE. Damn, I should’ve added him!!