Normality
At 3.45am on Saturday morning, we were walking across Waterloo bridge, the previous night still hanging in the air on our right, while the coming day was surely creeping up the sky on our left. It was a spectacular sight. Half and half, bisected by the bridge, my companion and I strolling along in a supernatural light. Wonderful. ‘To think,’ he said to me, ‘it does this, every day.’
Every day. That sun rises every farking day, without fail. It just so happened that we were there to see it for once, as it bleached out the horizon a bit more behind London, and as we mooched along Southbank, caught in a moment which had lasted a whole night – a lengthy moment, which, for me at least, existed outside of normality – I was happy.
I’d like to think it wasn’t just lack of sleep that gave my time in the nocturnal capital a magical quality. Obviously the person I was with, the café-bar we sat in, the things we talked and laughed and cried about, the places we walked (I can thoroughly recommend Covent Garden without another single soul in it, so much easier to navigate) and the sights we saw all contributed to what was, so easily, a perfect all-nighter. But it was something else as well. I think it’s just because it wasn’t me. It wasn’t anything I usually do. I don’t stay up late. I don’t drink tea in Italian bars at 2am. I don’t generally want to try and find somewhere that’s open at 5am so that I can have a long overdue piss. I’m not that kind of gal.
Only for that night, I was, and I loved it.
My normality sucks huge arse-balls right now. I have daily troubles which scare the shit out of me, if I’m honest. I knew the weekend away would be a good thing, and yeah, it totally was. And the all-nighter? Well, it’s damned cathartic to just really enjoy time spent with someone without letting everything else get in the way. Cathartic and life-affirming and so farking precious, you want to desperately cling on to every single fleeting second. I don’t get that a lot. Not recently. I needed it. I needed Waterloo bridge. I needed to see that sunrise.
Now, back to normality. Bah and fie. The bitter-sweet crash of that old bastard normality. If I could have bottled that sky above Waterloo bridge, I would have. I’d be drinking it in right now. Normality doesn’t even compare.
When was the last time you did something outside of normality?
My life is mundane and predictable. But I did belly dance on a table on a rare night out last weekend, in front of an adoring (drunk) crowd to celebrate my 3oth. It felt gooooood!
Wahooooo! Go you! That’s awesome
I love this post, simply wonderful.
Thanks lovely lady
I didn’t really eat my pregnant self! Bloody predictive spelling. *goes off to sleep before writes more about eating own children*
I read your post my this morning and was thinking about it on and off all day. I feel like what you are describing is that sense if ‘possibility.’ You know, the one you have when you’re a kid and a teenager and when you start university or your first real job or when you find out that you ate pregnant or when you feel your first contraction. The possibilities. I think when you are in the thick or parenting small children you can lose that sense because you pretty much do the same thing every day. It’s pretty much guaranteed that you’ll pick crap up off the floor a hundred times before lunch, change 8 nappies, wrestle the same kid into the pram…you get the idea. And obviously, we adore our children fiercely and would lie down in traffic for them but it’s ok to admit that it’s draining and yes, even boring sometimes and we would rather be walking the streets at 3am talking about what was or what might possibly be.
It’s lovely that you felt like yourself again for a night. I think you will feel more like your ‘old’ self as your daughter grows and hopefully the problems you refer to resolve.
You’re right. I had a life of possibilities ahead of me, and now, through the daily grind, they all seem to slip away. It’s tough. I now feel as if I want to do something – anything – to feel alive again. Maybe I’m not the sort of person who copes too well with routine, I dunno. There must be something more than this, yeah? Huh, now I’m rambling. Maybe I need sleep too…
Nice post, good to hear that you enjoyed yourself.
Um, the last time I did something outside of normality was years ago. Went to Mississippi for a mate’s wedding, and cooked a whole, gutted pig in the ground.
Is that normal practice for weddings over there?
Sunrise is magical. It lets you dream a life beyond your normalcy. Before the real thing creeps up and hits you over the head with a 2×4.*Sigh* T’was smashing to meet you finally Mrs *smooch*.
Yeah twas lovely to get a hug from you at last
A life beyond normalcy? I don’t think such a thing exists, really. Just the moments. And they are few and far between! Ah well, wouldn’t be special if you had them all the time.
Wow, that made my spine tingle. It’s an amazing view across the river. London really is a beautiful City but, as I work there, I really take it for granted sometimes. I really should make more of it.
My wife and I went to the Peak District a few weeks back and went on a 4 hour walk in the mist and rain and climbed Mam Tor. It was such a fantastic day.
I’ve never been to the Peak District. Mist and rain sounds a bit grim to me, but I am glad you had a great day with your wife
I haven’t done anything outside of normality since the Police confiscated my wetsuit after the unfortunate Rhino incident. It’s a bad day in hell when the World Wildlife Fund, Divers Anonymous AND the makers of Shipham’s Fish Paste threaten you with joint legal action.
That was YOU? Man alive, I saw that in the news and LAUGHED. You poor, poor man.
I have no idea what normality is? I just plod along with life.
Normality is the daily grind, for me. Same old, same old, with added unwelcome shit on top. If you’re plodding, I guess you must be doing OK.
Your London sounds epic. Its made me wish I did something like that when I lived there. You don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone and all that malarky. I love this post, hard.
I love London but only cos I don’t live there. I would find it very different if it was my home. I think being able to have nights like that is what makes it special – if I was there a lot, it would lose its appeal. Does that make sense?
I love how you write. Now I must go kill a kitten.
Oohhhhhh stamp on it. They hate that.
Ah it all sounds so lovely
But look for the good in your normality as well – there’s plenty of shit, but lots of good too. Enjoy all the moments missus (especially the ones involving a certain little someone) and one day the shit will get sorted as well. I shall stop preaching now, sorry xxx
No, you’re right, and I do treasure all my good times, I just get overwhelmed by the shit as well. Shit tends to be like that, the bastard. You’re not preaching, you make complete sense innit XXX
Normality is what makes the great times great – otherwise Waterloo bridge would look pretty darned boring every day! Glad you had a fab time though, and glad you have a fab baby girl too, she’s brilliant
x
Okay, now I want to go to London. Sounds amazing and wonderful. I hope that you are able to have a few more out of the ordinary experiences to cut up the doldrums of normalcy.
You’ve not been to London? You really should. I can recommend walking around during the early hours of the morning. Fewer people!!
I live in the middle of nowhere in America. I’ve never been to England. I would love to visit someday though.
Lemme know when you do. I can show you around. Well, I can show you around some of it. OK, I can show you around very little. But there’s bits you want to avoid anyhow…
hehe
Sounds good. I’ll keep that in mind. Might have to sell a kidney or something to afford the trip though.
Stowaway!
I know it doesn’t seem it now but you will have those moments again, not right now maybe but in the future…that night you described above will stay with you long enough till the next one, we had an adventure this wkend where tim put gazebo up, set up fairy lights, cooked ect…it happens about once a year, but that once stays with me…
I cant stress enough how much ‘it’ wont last, the way you feel…take each magical second and have it last for as long as you want, nothing saying you can’t (schedules permitting) arrange for something else magical to transport you away from it all again…
stay strong Mo Vo….as much as you might think you cant…you will:-)xxxx
There’s something about fairy lights, innit. Maybe cos they’re powered by fairies? I’m glad you still have magic moments, I am determined to keep having them, gawd knows we all need them every now and again
xxx
You forgot the bit about learning pointless facts about important walls.
I’m so glad you had a good time. It was an evening I’ll never forget and thank you for not saying no when I suggested doing something silly.
Although I am still surprised you thought, when I said ‘Let’s go and do something silly’ that you thought I was going to take you to a strip club. I’m not that kind of bloke.
Only thought that because we discussed it last time we were in London! And it is quite silly. But yeah, your idea was MUCH better. Thank you. For everything
the wall and the wall that used to be…
Walls are so interesting. Apparently.
Yeah. Walls. I really should just know when to shut up sometimes.
I thought it was interesting *falls about laughing*
I crave normality back in my life. Normal for my family is pretty shit right now. I’m not coping very well and I feel like my heart might break. I just want to be in London the way you’ve described it.
Oh sweetpea
I hear you. My normality is shit and I am also not coping too well. The only way I get through is with support from family and friends and knowing that I can vent on here really helps. Please talk to people, talk to someone who will listen, and I promise you will feel better soon. Hope you get your magical moment X
When was last time? A long time ago when i was young and without kids…
Sometimes i miss it though….
Ah you need one very very soon! Surely?
Beautiful post. Sounds like you had a great night. Hope the bad stuff gets better x
Thank you missus X
I’d love to drink Italian tea at 2am. Sounds really perfect. I think the last time I did something crazy like this was staying up till 6am with my friends in a hotel garden putting the world right. When there was finally daylight we realised that garden was half cemetery. I would never have done it if I’d known!
LOL that sounds awesome and spooky at the same time… I can heartily recommend the tea at 2am, but only if you’re in Soho…
Funny how seeing the sunrise on a ‘normal’ day would put me in the mother of all bad moods. Don’t generally do well without at least 7 hours kip. But on that occasion, in those circumstances, if I was you, with your companion. Yep, that’d be special.
Mahahahahah yes, usually anything before 7am is still the middle of the night. But it was v special. The best.
Sounds magical. One of those very rare moments where you feel in awe of the world and its wonders and possibilities. I recently went to Scotland for the weekend, by myself. For a mummy of three young ‘uns this was pretty unnormal and going alone was super unnormal, boarder-line weird. It’s was kinda liberating. I wrote about it here http://makingmywaytohappiness.wordpress.com/2012/05/23/travelling-solo-in-style/
That’s very brave – and kind of appealing… I’m going to read your post
How about running naked with 180 other women into the atlantic while been filmed by a film crew for Sir Terry of Wogan all to raise money for cancer and having breakfast on the beach with all the other wonderful women all shapes and sizes. Best day ever
Erm, yeah. That’s pretty special! Well done you
Please stop blogging brilliantly. You’ve just diverted me from a Very Important deadline about credit reference agencies and made me moon over missed sunrises.
Sorry, sorry, won’t happen again…
Sounds beautiful and I hope your normality moves closer towards the happiness you found on the weekend, you dirty stop-out!
LMAO thanks, I think
Beautiful. I know the setting wasn’t quite as amazing but that chat we had Sunday morning in our hotel room has given me lots of thoughtful moments. Like you say, back to normality….
Heart you loads lovely x
Heart you too, missus. Life is for living, innit
xx
What a post – fabulous.
Thank you so much X
You describe it beautifully. Wish I’d talked more to you on the weekend. Normality will get easier, and even enjoyable eventually. You are just doing the hard bit now.
I feel like we barely crossed paths! So many people there. Thank you for commenting. I hope you had a good weekend