Snot Impressed
Dear Parents
WIPE YOUR KID’S SNOTTY FECKING NOSE.
I know mine has a cold too. I try to wipe her nose as much as I can. I don’t like to see the sluggy-slimy trails of golden-green snot course down her face. It makes me feel a bit vomitous.
So if I can manage to wipe her nose, you can manage to wipe your own kid’s nose.
JUST FECKING DO IT.
It’s DISGUSTING.
And I’m not a scientist or a doctor, but even I know that if you get snot everywhere, that’s how DISEASES AND VIRUSES are spread. I’m pretty sure that’s how the Black Death started, when some medieval ladies didn’t wipe their medieval kids’ noses at medieval playgroup.
Eugh.
OK, vent over.
Regards,
motherventing (A Wiper Of Snotty Fecking Noses)
I have become immune to snot since E started nursery. Every morning thoughout the winter you open the door and a see of dozens of snotty faces look up at you. It’s the stuff nightmares are made of. Now I can handle the snot until they start licking it. That is a step too far!
*barf* Oh man, if Moo starts nursery I am going in there with a box of tissues and doing some serious plugging. Ew!
Oh God yes! Hate runny noses. Gross gross gross, gross gross gross gross…….. gross!
Oh I so completely agree with this. Toddlers with noses running over their lips makes me want to heave. And they drink out of each ofher’s beakers too, leaving snot trails behind.
What IS it with mums who think this is fine?
I might have a lie down actually. This, along with litter, is a big trigger of mine.
WIPE NOSES PEOPLE!
*mops brow with cool flannel* There, there…
Anyone remember that story about the magic porridge pot? I swear that kid’s noses are like that, just relentlessly churning out snot like little mucus factories.
Yes I am familiar with that tale. So true. If only there were a magic word to STOP THE SNOT. Sadly, this time of year it’s a fecking hazard.
I SO AGREE. The sight of snotty kids makes me want to hurl up my breakfast / lunch / dinner. Especially when it is that thick green snot – my gag reflew is going just thinking about it. Of course Iylas nose gets snotty but like you said I wipe it, every five seconds if needs be. Seriously disgusting, even some of my friends are guilty of this – that’s even worse because their kids come and try and climb on me with their snotty faces and I have to try and pretend to be nice whilst thinking – GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY TROUSERS. Sorry for shouting! xx
Mahahahaha that’s OK, shout away missus. I know Moo gets snotty and dribbly but I do try and keep her clean. Hope she didn’t snot on you today
x x x
I hear you MV….it’s disgusting. MC has just had the worst cold ever and her nose ran constantly but I was still there to wipe it every 5 seconds. She hates her nose running and always cries “Mummy, my nose is running, the bogies are coming!”
Ah bless her! I think it’s good to teach them to wipe it, then you don’t have to run around after them wielding tissues. Seriously, even if they use their SLEEVES it’s better than a crusty snotty face. Urgh
Oh my god, it drives me up a wall when I see green slime trails coming out of kids noses! Bleurgh!!!
I was and am still obsessed with B’s nose! The first sight of a booger, I’m in there with a tissue!
Mahahahhahaha you said ‘booger’
I am WITH YOU sistah. No snot on Moo’s face!!
I have just checked, spotted the green stuff and gone in for a wipe. Probably the 20th of the day. Now please stop shouting at me, i’m doing my best!
Mahahahah not shouting at YOU, y’ninny. But keep up the good wiping
There is an extremely environmentally friendly Nigerian tradition of snot removal that doesn’t involve pesky hankies. It involves clamping your mouth over the child’s snotty nose and sucking hard. Magic. All the snot vacuumed into mummy’s mouth. C’mon, you know you’d do anything for them, right? x
*barf* *boak* *vom*
Hear Hear, gawd, I hate that too. Since being a mum, I have a packet of hankies on the shelf by the front door before I venture out, in every pocket of every jacket for when I venture out and in every room on every floor for when I don’t venture out…. (yes I know I took a pic couple of weeks ago with a lovely green bogey, but that was before I wiped it off the face of his, er face)…
I may be a grubby mum but I don’t do snot. Urgh. It’s not HEALTHY. Go the wipers!